Back to the Future Part II:

On October 26, 1985, Dr. Emmett Brown arrives from the future and tells Marty McFly and his girlfriend Jennifer Parker that he needs their help to save their kids in the future. They depart in the flying DeLorean time machine as Biff Tannen accidentally witnesses the departure. They arrive on July 5, 2010, where Doc electronically hypnotizes Jennifer to sleep and leaves her unconscious in an alley to keep her away from his plan. Meanwhile, Doc has Marty pose as his son, Marty McFly, Jr., to refuse a robbery from Biff’s cybernetically enhanced grandson, Griff Tannen, which would result in the arrest of Marty Jr. and his sister Marlene for breaking him out of jail, and that these events would cause more downward turns for the McFly family. Marty refuses the deal, but Griff goads Marty into a fight; Marty escapes the fight and leads Griff and his gang on a hoverboard race across the courtyard square, ultimately resulting in Griff and his gang crashing through the courtyard windows and changing the future history as they are promptly arrested instead of Marty Jr. On his way back to meet with Doc, Marty purchases an almanac detailing results from major sporting events of the last half of the 20th century. Doc discovers the purchase and lectures Marty on trying to profit from time travel, but before Doc can dispose of the sports book, they are forced to follow the police who have found the sleeping Jennifer and are taking her to her future home. Old Biff, overhearing the conversation and recalling the DeLorean from 1985, follows with the discarded book.

Hoverboads? Cybernetic Enhancements?

Here’s a trailer for Space Battleship Yamato:

Major plot hole: Taylor should have realized he had returned “home” as soon as he heard apes speaking English. Astronauts are supposed to be smart after all.

I’ll handle this… the only danger in space is if we land on the terrible Planet of the Apes… wait a minute. Statue of Liberty… THAT WAS OUR PLANET! YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP! DAMN YOU! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!
— Homer J. Simpson

Beginning November 5th, BBI will be launching its very own website at MST3K.com. The site will feature brand-new animated adventures of Crow, Tom Servo and Gypsy. We’re told the goal is to have one new adventure each week (though “some settling may occur with shipping,” they added). The Web site will also feature work from the original series (which BBI is now calling “the legacy series”), behind-the-scenes footage and other material culled from the BBI vault.

…

The new adventures of the ‘bots are being produced by BBI President, MST3K series writer and the returning voice of Gypsy, Jim Mallon. He will be joined on this new experiment by veteran MST3K series writer and performer Paul Chaplin (who will be on the writing team and will be providing the voice of Crow) along with new writing and performing talent.

Second – via Cinematic Titanic:

It’s been just amazing the last few years: what with MST3K being honored as a top 25 science fiction show and top 25 “cult” show by TV Guide, and, most notably, in September being listed as one of the “Top One Hundred TV Shows Ever” by TIME – whew! Never saw it coming. Even mo-better are the really nice people that I’ve met who’ve had, and still have, great experiences watching horrendously great movies along with me and my funny friends. Thanks for mentioning it, thanks for keeping the dream alive, and thanks for buying the DVDs. It’s all been strange and mysterious and lovely, and it makes me want to do it all over again. And now, almost 20 years later, I am. I’ve decided, in collaboration with the other bold souls who “started it all,” to do a new project that is strong enough for our diehard audience, and also gentle and easy to swallow for those that are new to movie riffing. Wait for it….wait for it…. meet Cinematic Titanic!

It’s going to be powered by the original cast of MST3K! Trace Beaulieu, J. Elvis Weinstein and yours truly, along with some friends who came along later to make the show great: the beloved Frank Conniff and the scathingly brilliant Mary Jo Pehl.

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Happy Halloween,
Joel Hodgson

Cool!

Uncomfortable Questions: Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job?

1. Why were a handful of rebel fighters able to penetrate the defenses of a battle station that had the capability of destroying an entire planet and the defenses to ward off several fleets of battle ships?
   
   
2. Why did Grand Moff Tarkin refuse to deploy the station’s large fleet of TIE Fighters until it was too late? Was he acting on orders from somebody to not shoot down the rebel attack force? If so, who, and why?
   
   
3. Why was the rebel pilot who supposedly destroyed the Death Star reported to be on the Death Star days, maybe hours, prior to its destruction? Why was he allowed to escape, and why were several individuals dressed in Stormtrooper uniforms seen helping him?
   
   
4. Why has there not been an investigation into allegations that Darth Vader, the second-ranking member of the Imperial Government, is in fact the father of the pilot who allegedly destroyed the Death Star?
   
   
5. Why did Lord Vader decide to break all protocols and personally pilot a lightly armored TIE Fighter? Conveniently, this placed Lord Vader outside of the Death Star when it was destroyed, where he was also conveniently able to escape from a large-sized rebel fleet that had just routed the Imperial forces. Why would Lord Vader, one of the highest ranking members of the Imperial Government, suddenly decide to fly away from the Death Star in the middle of a battle? Did he know something that the rest of the Imperial Navy didn’t?
   
   
6. How could any pilot shoot a missile into a 2 meter-wide exhaust port, let alone a pilot with no formal training, whose only claim to fame was his ability to “bullseye womprats” on Tatooine? This shot, according to one pilot, would be “impossible, even for a computer.” Yet, according to additional evidence, the pilot who allegedly fired the missile turned off his targeting computer when he was supposedly firing the shot that destroyed the Death Star. Why have these discrepancies never been investigated, let alone explained?
   
   
7. Why has their been no investigation into evidence that the droids who provided the rebels with the Death Star plans were once owned by none other than Lord Vader himself, and were found, conveniently, by the pilot who destroyed the Death Star, and who is also believed to be Lord Vader’s son? Evidence also shows that the droids were brought to one Ben Kenobi, who, records indicate, was Darth Vader’s teacher many years earlier! Are all these personal connections between the conspirators and a key figure in the Imperial government supposed to be coincidences?
   
   
8. How could a single missile destroy a battle station the size of a moon? No records, anywhere, show that any battle station or capital ship has ever been destroyed by a single missile. Furthermore, analysis of the tape of the last moments of the Death Star show numerous small explosions along its surface, prior to it exploding completely! Why does all evidence indicate that strategically placed explosives, not a single missile, is what destroyed the Death Star?

Was the Death Star Attack an Inside Job? We report, you decide.